Landy's ... The best 4 X 4 on tar!
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Land Rover … The best 4 X 4 on tar!
They say 90% of all Land Rovers manufactured are still on the road.
The other 10% have reached their destination.
All Land Rovers are like women - they moan on long journeys, embarrass you in front of friends and cost you more money than you ever expected, once you've committed yourself to one.
Police officers shake your hand when they issue you a speeding ticket.
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Why do most Defenders have jerry cans and gas bottles fitted?
So that the driver can make coffee while waiting for road assistance.
Landy’s have the best fuel consumption of all 4x4's.
That's because they are always being towed by something else.
Why do Land Rovers always drive in convoy?
They are playing 'Who's the Weakest Link?'
I always wondered why they called their models, a Series 90, Defender 110 etc.
But this weekend I found out, those numbers in the model name are the top speeds.
When you drive on a toll road, you get these yellow emergency phones next to the road. Stop and look closer. On the phones there are emergency numbers: police, ambulance, doctor and Land Rover Service.
Q: What do you find on pages 4 and 5 of the Landy's user's manual?
A: The train & bus schedule.
Q: What is the sport-version of a Landy?
A: When the driver wears Nike shoes.
Q: What do you call a Landy with brakes?
A: Customised.
Q: What do you have to do if your Landy gets in the way of a swarm of killer bees?
A: Stop pushing and take refuge inside the car.
Q. Why do the latest models have rear window demisters?
A. To keep the hands warm when pushing.
Land Rover has a special this month!!
If you buy one, you get a dog for free!! Then you do not have to walk home alone.
Landy's ... The best 4 X 4 on tar!
Description: Description: Description: Description: cid:image001.jpg@01CE4107.B4FCDC90
Land Rover … The best 4 X 4 on tar!
They say 90% of all Land Rovers manufactured are still on the road.
The other 10% have reached their destination.
All Land Rovers are like women - they moan on long journeys, embarrass you in front of friends and cost you more money than you ever expected, once you've committed yourself to one.
Police officers shake your hand when they issue you a speeding ticket.
Description: Description: Description: Description: cid:image002.jpg@01CE4107.B4FCDC90
Why do most Defenders have jerry cans and gas bottles fitted?
So that the driver can make coffee while waiting for road assistance.
Landy’s have the best fuel consumption of all 4x4's.
That's because they are always being towed by something else.
Why do Land Rovers always drive in convoy?
They are playing 'Who's the Weakest Link?'
I always wondered why they called their models, a Series 90, Defender 110 etc.
But this weekend I found out, those numbers in the model name are the top speeds.
When you drive on a toll road, you get these yellow emergency phones next to the road. Stop and look closer. On the phones there are emergency numbers: police, ambulance, doctor and Land Rover Service.
Q: What do you find on pages 4 and 5 of the Landy's user's manual?
A: The train & bus schedule.
Q: What is the sport-version of a Landy?
A: When the driver wears Nike shoes.
Q: What do you call a Landy with brakes?
A: Customised.
Q: What do you have to do if your Landy gets in the way of a swarm of killer bees?
A: Stop pushing and take refuge inside the car.
Q. Why do the latest models have rear window demisters?
A. To keep the hands warm when pushing.
Land Rover has a special this month!!
If you buy one, you get a dog for free!! Then you do not have to walk home alone.
Land Rover … The best 4 X 4 on tar!
They say 90% of all Land Rovers manufactured are still on the road.
The other 10% have reached their destination.
All Land Rovers are like women - they moan on long journeys, embarrass you in front of friends and cost you more money than you ever expected, once you've committed yourself to one.
Police officers shake your hand when they issue you a speeding ticket.
Description: Description: Description: Description: cid:image002.jpg@01CE4107.B4FCDC90
Why do most Defenders have jerry cans and gas bottles fitted?
So that the driver can make coffee while waiting for road assistance.
Landy’s have the best fuel consumption of all 4x4's.
That's because they are always being towed by something else.
Why do Land Rovers always drive in convoy?
They are playing 'Who's the Weakest Link?'
I always wondered why they called their models, a Series 90, Defender 110 etc.
But this weekend I found out, those numbers in the model name are the top speeds.
When you drive on a toll road, you get these yellow emergency phones next to the road. Stop and look closer. On the phones there are emergency numbers: police, ambulance, doctor and Land Rover Service.
Q: What do you find on pages 4 and 5 of the Landy's user's manual?
A: The train & bus schedule.
Q: What is the sport-version of a Landy?
A: When the driver wears Nike shoes.
Q: What do you call a Landy with brakes?
A: Customised.
Q: What do you have to do if your Landy gets in the way of a swarm of killer bees?
A: Stop pushing and take refuge inside the car.
Q. Why do the latest models have rear window demisters?
A. To keep the hands warm when pushing.
Land Rover has a special this month!!
If you buy one, you get a dog for free!! Then you do not have to walk home alone.
Description: Description: Description: Image removed by sender.
Landy
Forum rules
Please keep it light hearted enol. No serious stufs hey! :)
We are trying to make the technical information more visible in the Active Topics section. So we are trying to combine all the humour posts into a single thread. This will then more or less always stay on the active topics page if you keep appending your jokes onto this single thread. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated
Please keep it light hearted enol. No serious stufs hey! :)
We are trying to make the technical information more visible in the Active Topics section. So we are trying to combine all the humour posts into a single thread. This will then more or less always stay on the active topics page if you keep appending your jokes onto this single thread. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated
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Thunder02
- Moderator
- Posts: 8033
- Joined: Fri Nov 26, 2010 7:53 pm
- Town: East Rand
- Vehicle: IFS Hilux
- Real Name: Neil
- Club VHF Licence: HC105
- Location: 4x4 Direct Boksburg
- Contact:
Re: Landy
Koos ,welcome back long time no see or hear. 
Not all those who wander are lost!
Scout motto:be prepared....
www.4x4direct.co.za
Email: boksburg@4x4direct.co.za
IFS is like a swambo, soft, sexy and expensive!
Scout motto:be prepared....
www.4x4direct.co.za
Email: boksburg@4x4direct.co.za
IFS is like a swambo, soft, sexy and expensive!
