Joke of the day
Forum rules
Please keep it light hearted enol. No serious stufs hey! :)
We are trying to make the technical information more visible in the Active Topics section. So we are trying to combine all the humour posts into a single thread. This will then more or less always stay on the active topics page if you keep appending your jokes onto this single thread. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated
Please keep it light hearted enol. No serious stufs hey! :)
We are trying to make the technical information more visible in the Active Topics section. So we are trying to combine all the humour posts into a single thread. This will then more or less always stay on the active topics page if you keep appending your jokes onto this single thread. Your assistance will be greatly appreciated
- Mud Dog
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- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
There is little as infectious as laughter - see if you can stop yourself laughing along with these guys doing a test of Helium Beer .....
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3V9QHBgrPNY" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3V9QHBgrPNY" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Froll
- Monster Truck
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Re: Joke of the day
Hahaha, very funny. That should be a good trick to pull on some one.
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
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- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
After my recent Prostate Exam, which was by far one of the most thorough examinations I've ever had, the Doctor left and the nurse came in.
As she shut the door, she asked me a question I didn't want to hear....
She said...."Who Was That guy?"
.
As she shut the door, she asked me a question I didn't want to hear....
She said...."Who Was That guy?"
.
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Thunder02
- Moderator
- Posts: 8033
- Joined: Fri Nov 26, 2010 7:53 pm
- Town: East Rand
- Vehicle: IFS Hilux
- Real Name: Neil
- Club VHF Licence: HC105
- Location: 4x4 Direct Boksburg
- Contact:
Re: Joke of the day
Ouch.......Mud Dog wrote:After my recent Prostate Exam, which was by far one of the most thorough examinations I've ever had, the Doctor left and the nurse came in.
As she shut the door, she asked me a question I didn't want to hear....
She said...."Who Was That guy?"
.
Not all those who wander are lost!
Scout motto:be prepared....
www.4x4direct.co.za
Email: boksburg@4x4direct.co.za
IFS is like a swambo, soft, sexy and expensive!
Scout motto:be prepared....
www.4x4direct.co.za
Email: boksburg@4x4direct.co.za
IFS is like a swambo, soft, sexy and expensive!
- Family_Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 12711
- Joined: Tue May 22, 2007 10:09 am
- Town: Klerksdorp
- Vehicle: Hilux DC SFA, Hilux 2.7 DC, Hilux 2.7 SC, Prado 95 VX
- Real Name: Eric
- Club VHF Licence: HC101
- Location: Klerksdorp, NW
- Contact:
Re: Joke of the day
I actually went for one today - PSA came down nicely after the brachytherapy treatment
And yes, it was the doc who tested me!
-F_D
And yes, it was the doc who tested me!
-F_D
White Fang: 1999 2.7i DC Raider 4x4
Bull Dog: 1987 4Y-EFI 2.2 DC 4x4
Pra Dog: 1998 Prado VX 3.4
Hound Dog: 2000 2.7i SC 4x4
One Staffie, One Jack Russell, One Ring Neck Screecher, 17 Fish of questionable heritage
- Mud Dog
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- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
Good to hear!Family_Dog wrote:I actually went for one today - PSA came down nicely after the brachytherapy treatment
And yes, it was the doc who tested me!
-F_D
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Knuppel
- LR 4WD Full Lockers
- Posts: 553
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- Town: Somewhere in Africa
- Vehicle: '87 SFA HILUX D/CAB
- Real Name: Marius
Re: Joke of the day
Went for prostate exam......thinking back about it now..... I swear the doc had both hands on my shoulders....
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Dirka
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 212
- Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2015 2:16 pm
- Town: Doornpoort Pretoria
- Vehicle: Hilux 4.0 V6 4X4 Auto DC
- Real Name: Dirk
Re: Joke of the day
“I got arrested for driving naked. I guess I shouldn’t have put four wheels, an engine, and a steering wheel on my bathtub.
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
- Obelix and Dogmatix
- LR4WD, Lockers, Crawler Gears
- Posts: 1837
- Joined: Sun Nov 17, 2013 5:27 pm
- Town: ROODEPOORT
- Vehicle: HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix, donated to some clown, HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix II Onca front and rear Amade extreme Suspension and under water breathing apparatus
- Real Name: Quentin
- Location: Allens Nek
Re: Joke of the day
A plane with 5 people on board was about to crash, but there were only 4 parachutes.
The 1st person, Lionel Messi, said,
"I'm the world's best footballer, I cant die now!"
So he took one of the parachutes and left.
Aliko Dangote, said,
"I'm the richest man in Africa, I can't die now!" So he took the 2nd parachute and left.
The third was a Jacob Zuma and he said,
"I'm the president of SA moreover another election is around the corner, so I cant die now!"
So he took one and left.
Then the Pope said to the little girl,
"Take the last one, I'll sacrifice my life for you."
The little girl replied,
"No need for that, your Holiness, there are two parachutes left."
The pope asked her,
"How come?"
The little girl replied,
"That SA President took my school bag !
The 1st person, Lionel Messi, said,
"I'm the world's best footballer, I cant die now!"
So he took one of the parachutes and left.
Aliko Dangote, said,
"I'm the richest man in Africa, I can't die now!" So he took the 2nd parachute and left.
The third was a Jacob Zuma and he said,
"I'm the president of SA moreover another election is around the corner, so I cant die now!"
So he took one and left.
Then the Pope said to the little girl,
"Take the last one, I'll sacrifice my life for you."
The little girl replied,
"No need for that, your Holiness, there are two parachutes left."
The pope asked her,
"How come?"
The little girl replied,
"That SA President took my school bag !
Rules are there to make you think before you break them!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!
- Baasvark
- LR4WD, Lockers, Crawler Gears
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- Town: Virginia
- Vehicle: '97 D/C with all the trimmings & 2011 Troopy
- Real Name: Shane
Re: Joke of the day
Sent from my SM-N920C using Tapatalk
Last edited by Baasvark on Sat Apr 16, 2016 8:12 am, edited 1 time in total.
Aint it ironic that "Common Sense" aint so common after all...
- Thunder02
- Moderator
- Posts: 8033
- Joined: Fri Nov 26, 2010 7:53 pm
- Town: East Rand
- Vehicle: IFS Hilux
- Real Name: Neil
- Club VHF Licence: HC105
- Location: 4x4 Direct Boksburg
- Contact:
Re: Joke of the day
We can only wish
Not all those who wander are lost!
Scout motto:be prepared....
www.4x4direct.co.za
Email: boksburg@4x4direct.co.za
IFS is like a swambo, soft, sexy and expensive!
Scout motto:be prepared....
www.4x4direct.co.za
Email: boksburg@4x4direct.co.za
IFS is like a swambo, soft, sexy and expensive!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
The rain was pouring down. And there standing in front of a big puddle outside the pub, was an old Irishman, drenched, holding a stick, with a piece of string dangling in the water.
A passer-by stopped and asked, "What are you doing?"
"Fishing", replied the old man.
Feeling sorry for the old man, the gent says, "Come in out of the rain and have a drink with me." In the warmth of the pub, as they sip their whiskies, the gentleman cannot resist asking, "So how many have you caught today?"
"You're the eighth", says the old man.
A passer-by stopped and asked, "What are you doing?"
"Fishing", replied the old man.
Feeling sorry for the old man, the gent says, "Come in out of the rain and have a drink with me." In the warmth of the pub, as they sip their whiskies, the gentleman cannot resist asking, "So how many have you caught today?"
"You're the eighth", says the old man.
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
Norman and Barry got married in California .......
They couldn't afford a honeymoon so they went back to Norman's Mum and Dad's house for their first married night together.
In the morning, Little Johnny, Norman's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.
As he's going out of the door to go to school, he asks his mum if Norman and Barry are up yet.
She replies, 'No'.
Little Johnny asks, 'Do you know what I think?'
His mum replies, 'I don't want to hear what you think!! Just go to school.'
Little Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mum, 'Are Norman and Barry up yet?' She replies, 'No...'
Johnny says, 'Do you know what I think?'
His mum replies, 'Never mind what you think!! Eat your lunch and go back to school.'
After school, Little Johnny comes home and asks again, 'Are Norman and Barry up yet?' His mum says, 'No.'
He asks, 'Do you know what I think?'
His mum replies, 'Oh OK then, tell me what you think.'
He says: 'Last night Norman came to my room for the Vaseline and I think... I gave him my airplane glue.'
They couldn't afford a honeymoon so they went back to Norman's Mum and Dad's house for their first married night together.
In the morning, Little Johnny, Norman's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast.
As he's going out of the door to go to school, he asks his mum if Norman and Barry are up yet.
She replies, 'No'.
Little Johnny asks, 'Do you know what I think?'
His mum replies, 'I don't want to hear what you think!! Just go to school.'
Little Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mum, 'Are Norman and Barry up yet?' She replies, 'No...'
Johnny says, 'Do you know what I think?'
His mum replies, 'Never mind what you think!! Eat your lunch and go back to school.'
After school, Little Johnny comes home and asks again, 'Are Norman and Barry up yet?' His mum says, 'No.'
He asks, 'Do you know what I think?'
His mum replies, 'Oh OK then, tell me what you think.'
He says: 'Last night Norman came to my room for the Vaseline and I think... I gave him my airplane glue.'
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Dowe Koos
- LR4WD, Lockers, Crawler Gears
- Posts: 1053
- Joined: Fri Oct 10, 2014 6:44 pm
- Town: Pretoria
- Vehicle: Toyota Buschwagen 2.7 4x4
- Real Name: Hennie
Re: Joke of the day
+1
Ecc 1:9 Wat gewees het, dit sal daar weer wees; en wat gebeur het, dit sal weer gebeur, en daar is glad niks nuuts onder die son nie.
- Obelix and Dogmatix
- LR4WD, Lockers, Crawler Gears
- Posts: 1837
- Joined: Sun Nov 17, 2013 5:27 pm
- Town: ROODEPOORT
- Vehicle: HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix, donated to some clown, HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix II Onca front and rear Amade extreme Suspension and under water breathing apparatus
- Real Name: Quentin
- Location: Allens Nek
Re: Joke of the day
Pasop vir die Boere.
Barack Obama was sitting in his office wondering which country to invade next, when his telephone rang.
"Howzit, Barack!" a voice in broken English said. "This is Koos Vannermerwe here from the Doringboom Bar in Welkom , South Africa . I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you, boet!"
"Well, Koos," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Koos, after a moment's calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Jan, my next-door neighbour Lang Hannes, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eight of us!"
Barack paused. "I must tell you, Koos, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Blikkiesfontein!" said Koos. "I'll have to ring you back!" Sure enough, the next day, Koos called again."Barack, my china, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be, Koos?" Barack asked.
"Well, we have four Hilux double-cabs, two kombis, an old Case bulldozer, and Vet Gert's John Deere tractor".
Barack sighed. "I must tell you, Koos, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to 1,5 million since we last spoke."
"Liewe erdvark!" said Koos. "I'll have to get back to you..." Sure enough, Koos rang again the next day. "Barack, ou swaer, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified Doepie's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four okes from the Virginia Hengelklub have joined us as well!"
Barack was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must tell you, Koos, I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Slaat my dood!", said Koos, "I'll have to ring you back." Sure enough, Koos called again the next day. "Jis, jis, jis, Barack! I am sorry to tell you that we've had to call off the war."
"I'm sorry to hear that," said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
"Well," said Koos, "we've all had a long chat over some klippies and coke, and decided there's no way we can feed two million prisoners of war!"
Like
Barack Obama was sitting in his office wondering which country to invade next, when his telephone rang.
"Howzit, Barack!" a voice in broken English said. "This is Koos Vannermerwe here from the Doringboom Bar in Welkom , South Africa . I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you, boet!"
"Well, Koos," Barack replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"
"Right now," said Koos, after a moment's calculation, "there is myself, my cousin Jan, my next-door neighbour Lang Hannes, and the entire darts team from the pub. That makes eight of us!"
Barack paused. "I must tell you, Koos, that I have one million men in my army waiting to move on my command."
"Blikkiesfontein!" said Koos. "I'll have to ring you back!" Sure enough, the next day, Koos called again."Barack, my china, the war is still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be, Koos?" Barack asked.
"Well, we have four Hilux double-cabs, two kombis, an old Case bulldozer, and Vet Gert's John Deere tractor".
Barack sighed. "I must tell you, Koos, that I have 16,000 tanks and 14,000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I've increased my army to 1,5 million since we last spoke."
"Liewe erdvark!" said Koos. "I'll have to get back to you..." Sure enough, Koos rang again the next day. "Barack, ou swaer, the war is still on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne! We've modified Doepie's ultra-light with a couple of shotguns in the cockpit, and four okes from the Virginia Hengelklub have joined us as well!"
Barack was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must tell you, Koos, I have 10,000 bombers and 20,000 fighter planes. My military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile sites. And since we last spoke, I've increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Slaat my dood!", said Koos, "I'll have to ring you back." Sure enough, Koos called again the next day. "Jis, jis, jis, Barack! I am sorry to tell you that we've had to call off the war."
"I'm sorry to hear that," said Barack. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
"Well," said Koos, "we've all had a long chat over some klippies and coke, and decided there's no way we can feed two million prisoners of war!"
Like
Rules are there to make you think before you break them!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
A woman goes into the Bass Pro Shop to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter.
A Bass Pro Shop associate is standing there wearing dark shades. She says, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says, "Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything from the sound it makes."
She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.
He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-LB. test line.
It's a good all around combination and it's on sale this week for only $20.00."
She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor.
Oh, that sounds like a Master Card," he says.
She bends down to pick it up and accidentally passes gas. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.
The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please."
The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me the rod and reel were on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?"
He replies, "Yes, Ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck Call is $11.00 and the Bear Repellent is $3.50."
A Bass Pro Shop associate is standing there wearing dark shades. She says, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?"
He says, "Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything from the sound it makes."
She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway.
He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco 404 reel and 10-LB. test line.
It's a good all around combination and it's on sale this week for only $20.00."
She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor.
Oh, that sounds like a Master Card," he says.
She bends down to pick it up and accidentally passes gas. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around.
The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please."
The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me the rod and reel were on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?"
He replies, "Yes, Ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck Call is $11.00 and the Bear Repellent is $3.50."
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
Nou gaan ons mos braai!
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Pietman
- LR 4WD Rear Locker
- Posts: 289
- Joined: Tue Sep 16, 2008 9:33 pm
- Town: Nelspruit
- Vehicle: 2005 Hilux V6 4L D/C 4X4
- Real Name: Pieter
Re: Joke of the day
Trieng trieng!!!
"Hallo baas. Dis Philemon, die gardenboy op jou plaas. Ek probeer jou al dae lank in die hande kry."
"Hallo Philemon. Wat kan ek vir jou doen? Is daar probleme?"
"Uum. Ja my baas. Ek bel net om te vertel die baas se papagaai is dood."
"My papagaai? Dood? Die een wat die nasionale kompetisie gewen het?"
"Yebo. Dis hy daai my baas."
"Jissie Philemon, dis nou jammer. Ek het 'n klein fortuin op daardie voël
spandeer. Waaraan is hy dood?"
"Hy het vrot vleis geëet my baas."
"Vrot vleis? Wie het vir hom vrot vleis gegee Philemon?"
"Niemand nie my baas. Hy het die vleis van die dooie perd geëet."
"Dooie perd? Watter dooie perd Philemon?"
"Die thoroughbred my baas."
"My pryswenner perd is dood?"
"Yebo my baas. Hy's dood van al die harde werk om die waterkar te trek."
"Is jy nou bedonerd Philemon? Watter waterkar?"
"Die een wat ons gebruik het om die vuur dood te maak, my baas."
"Goeie moer, van watse vuur praat jy Philemon?"
"Die een in jou huis my baas. Die kers, hy het geval en die gordyne aan
die brand gesteek."
"Wat??? Wil jy nou sê die huis het afgebrand deur 'n blerrie kers wat omgeval het?"
"Yebo my baas."
"Maar daar is mos elektrisiteit by die huis Philemon. Waarvoor het die kers gebrand?"
"Vir die funeral my baas."
"WATTER DONNERSE FUNERAL PHILEMON?"
"Van jou vrou my baas. Sy het een aand hier aangekom en vir niemand
vertel sy kom nie. Ek het gedog dis 'n rower, toe slaan ek haar dood met die baas se nuwe vistok."
STILTE.....
"Philemon, as jy my visstok gebreek het, bliksem ek jou dood!!!"
"Hallo baas. Dis Philemon, die gardenboy op jou plaas. Ek probeer jou al dae lank in die hande kry."
"Hallo Philemon. Wat kan ek vir jou doen? Is daar probleme?"
"Uum. Ja my baas. Ek bel net om te vertel die baas se papagaai is dood."
"My papagaai? Dood? Die een wat die nasionale kompetisie gewen het?"
"Yebo. Dis hy daai my baas."
"Jissie Philemon, dis nou jammer. Ek het 'n klein fortuin op daardie voël
spandeer. Waaraan is hy dood?"
"Hy het vrot vleis geëet my baas."
"Vrot vleis? Wie het vir hom vrot vleis gegee Philemon?"
"Niemand nie my baas. Hy het die vleis van die dooie perd geëet."
"Dooie perd? Watter dooie perd Philemon?"
"Die thoroughbred my baas."
"My pryswenner perd is dood?"
"Yebo my baas. Hy's dood van al die harde werk om die waterkar te trek."
"Is jy nou bedonerd Philemon? Watter waterkar?"
"Die een wat ons gebruik het om die vuur dood te maak, my baas."
"Goeie moer, van watse vuur praat jy Philemon?"
"Die een in jou huis my baas. Die kers, hy het geval en die gordyne aan
die brand gesteek."
"Wat??? Wil jy nou sê die huis het afgebrand deur 'n blerrie kers wat omgeval het?"
"Yebo my baas."
"Maar daar is mos elektrisiteit by die huis Philemon. Waarvoor het die kers gebrand?"
"Vir die funeral my baas."
"WATTER DONNERSE FUNERAL PHILEMON?"
"Van jou vrou my baas. Sy het een aand hier aangekom en vir niemand
vertel sy kom nie. Ek het gedog dis 'n rower, toe slaan ek haar dood met die baas se nuwe vistok."
STILTE.....
"Philemon, as jy my visstok gebreek het, bliksem ek jou dood!!!"
EX ALTO VINCIMUS
- ChrisF
- Top Web Wheeler
- Posts: 8188
- Joined: Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:56 pm
- Town: inniedorp
- Vehicle: Toy
- Real Name: Chris
Re: Joke of the day
bly hy het darem sy prioriteite reg ....
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Dirka
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 212
- Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2015 2:16 pm
- Town: Doornpoort Pretoria
- Vehicle: Hilux 4.0 V6 4X4 Auto DC
- Real Name: Dirk
Re: Joke of the day
Oupa vat elke oggend sy 5-jarige kleindogter Ansie skool toe.
Toe hy een oggend siek is vat ouma haar.
Die aand vertel sy haar ma en pa dat die ryery saam met ouma baie anders was as saam met oupa.
"Hoekom?", vra hulle.
Sy antwoord:
" Ek en ouma het nie een flippen idioot, blinde bliks@m of dom d@nner op die pad gesien nie!"
Toe hy een oggend siek is vat ouma haar.
Die aand vertel sy haar ma en pa dat die ryery saam met ouma baie anders was as saam met oupa.
"Hoekom?", vra hulle.
Sy antwoord:
" Ek en ouma het nie een flippen idioot, blinde bliks@m of dom d@nner op die pad gesien nie!"
“I got arrested for driving naked. I guess I shouldn’t have put four wheels, an engine, and a steering wheel on my bathtub.
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- pietdevs
- LR 4WD Rear Locker
- Posts: 255
- Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2011 12:29 pm
- Town: Mosselbay
- Vehicle: Toyota Land Cruiser Troopy
- Real Name: Pieter
- Location: Mosselbay
- Contact:
Re: Joke of the day
In many years I have come to the conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm and three or more is a government!
Foreign aid is defined as the transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
What we need in SA is more unemployed politicians!
Foreign aid is defined as the transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor countries.
What we need in SA is more unemployed politicians!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
At a wedding ceremony, the pastor asked if anyone had anything to say concerning the union of the bride and groom. It was their time to stand up and talk, or forever hold their peace. The silence was broken by a young beautiful woman walking toward the front of the church, carrying a child in her arms.
The atmosphere turned to chaos. The bride slapped the groom. The groom's mother fainted. The grooms-men wondered how to help save the situation.
The pastor asked the woman, "Can you tell us why you came forward? What do you have to say?"
The woman replied, "We can't hear at the back."
The atmosphere turned to chaos. The bride slapped the groom. The groom's mother fainted. The grooms-men wondered how to help save the situation.
The pastor asked the woman, "Can you tell us why you came forward? What do you have to say?"
The woman replied, "We can't hear at the back."
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
Hey guys, this is a fairly urgent 'shout-out'.
A friend of mine in Cape Town has a ticket for the Springboks vs Ireland game at Newlands on the 11th June. When he bought the ticket he didn't realise that the match is on the same day as his wedding and now he is urgently looking for someone to go in his place.
The church is in Swellendam, the brides name is Jennifer and everything is already paid for. All you have to do is turn up and say "I do".
A friend of mine in Cape Town has a ticket for the Springboks vs Ireland game at Newlands on the 11th June. When he bought the ticket he didn't realise that the match is on the same day as his wedding and now he is urgently looking for someone to go in his place.
The church is in Swellendam, the brides name is Jennifer and everything is already paid for. All you have to do is turn up and say "I do".
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Froll
- Monster Truck
- Posts: 3305
- Joined: Sat Oct 13, 2012 10:13 pm
- Town: Vioolsdrift
- Vehicle: 2010 4.0 V6 Fortuner 4x4
- Real Name: Roger
- Club VHF Licence: N/A
Re: Joke of the day
Forward pics of bride.......
- ChrisF
- Top Web Wheeler
- Posts: 8188
- Joined: Thu Sep 17, 2009 2:56 pm
- Town: inniedorp
- Vehicle: Toy
- Real Name: Chris
Re: Joke of the day
Just look for the lonely lady in white in front of this majestic old church in the main road of SwellendamFroll wrote:Forward pics of bride.......
- Froll
- Monster Truck
- Posts: 3305
- Joined: Sat Oct 13, 2012 10:13 pm
- Town: Vioolsdrift
- Vehicle: 2010 4.0 V6 Fortuner 4x4
- Real Name: Roger
- Club VHF Licence: N/A
Re: Joke of the day
have to get past the wife first.
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
What the eye doesn't see, the heart doesn't feel!Froll wrote: have to get past the wife first.
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
Johnny's teacher is giving a lesson on Nutrition, and she decides to ask her students what they had for Breakfast.
To add a Spelling Component, she asks the students to also spell their answers.
Susan puts up her hand and says she had an Egg, 'E-G-G'
Very good', says the teacher.
Peter says he had Toast, 'T-O-A-S-T?
'Excellent.'
Johnny has his hand up and the teacher reluctantly calls on him:
'I had Bugger All', he says, ' B-U-G-G-E-R-A-L-L'.
The teacher is mortified and scolds Johnny for his rude answer
Later, when the lesson turns to Geography, she asks the students some
rudimentary questions.
Susan correctly identifies the Capital of Canada. Peter is able to tell her which ocean is off Canada 's East Coast.
When it's Johnny's turn, the teacher remembers his rude answer from the Nutrition Lesson, and decides to give him a very difficult question:
"Johnny", she asks, 'Where is the Pakistani Border?'
Johnny ponders the question and finally says, "The Pakistani border is in bed with my mother. That's why I got Bugger All for Breakfast."
To add a Spelling Component, she asks the students to also spell their answers.
Susan puts up her hand and says she had an Egg, 'E-G-G'
Very good', says the teacher.
Peter says he had Toast, 'T-O-A-S-T?
'Excellent.'
Johnny has his hand up and the teacher reluctantly calls on him:
'I had Bugger All', he says, ' B-U-G-G-E-R-A-L-L'.
The teacher is mortified and scolds Johnny for his rude answer
Later, when the lesson turns to Geography, she asks the students some
rudimentary questions.
Susan correctly identifies the Capital of Canada. Peter is able to tell her which ocean is off Canada 's East Coast.
When it's Johnny's turn, the teacher remembers his rude answer from the Nutrition Lesson, and decides to give him a very difficult question:
"Johnny", she asks, 'Where is the Pakistani Border?'
Johnny ponders the question and finally says, "The Pakistani border is in bed with my mother. That's why I got Bugger All for Breakfast."
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Dirka
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 212
- Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2015 2:16 pm
- Town: Doornpoort Pretoria
- Vehicle: Hilux 4.0 V6 4X4 Auto DC
- Real Name: Dirk
Re: Joke of the day
2 Quick ones..
A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband a text:
"If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.
If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite.
If you are drinking, send me a sip.
If you are crying, send me your tears.
I Love you!"
The husband, typically non-romantic, replied:
"I am on the toilet. Please advise."
Bloke falling from a plane and can't open his chute.
He meets a bloke going upwards and asks him:
"Do you know anything about parachutes?"
The bloke going up replies:
"No, do you know anything about gas cookers?"
A wife, being the romantic sort, sent her husband a text:
"If you are sleeping, send me your dreams.
If you are laughing, send me your smile.
If you are eating, send me a bite.
If you are drinking, send me a sip.
If you are crying, send me your tears.
I Love you!"
The husband, typically non-romantic, replied:
"I am on the toilet. Please advise."
Bloke falling from a plane and can't open his chute.
He meets a bloke going upwards and asks him:
"Do you know anything about parachutes?"
The bloke going up replies:
"No, do you know anything about gas cookers?"
“I got arrested for driving naked. I guess I shouldn’t have put four wheels, an engine, and a steering wheel on my bathtub.
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
-
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 160
- Joined: Tue Dec 02, 2014 2:10 pm
- Town: King Williams Town
- Vehicle: Isuzu
- Real Name: Craig
Re: Joke of the day
[FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY]
Sent from my D2403 using Tapatalk
Sent from my D2403 using Tapatalk
Isuzu 250D 4x2 with diffy lock
1 x Humorous Driver
GPS,Dashcam,tyre levers
I don't live in Africa, Africa lives in me - Kyle my son.
1 x Humorous Driver
GPS,Dashcam,tyre levers
I don't live in Africa, Africa lives in me - Kyle my son.
- Hilux 1
- Monster Truck
- Posts: 4127
- Joined: Tue Sep 28, 2010 2:24 pm
- Town: Brackenfell
- Vehicle: 2011 Raider 4x4 Double cab 4.0 V6
- Real Name: Tertius
- Club VHF Licence: HC137
Re: Joke of the day
The joke goes somthing like this: a dad remarried, after a week or so, he told his son:
You know what? Marraige has been good to me second time round (remembering the man being of age allready), his son said: great dad but i do not need to know stuff like this, the dad says: i'm having sex almost every night of the week. Almost Monday, almost Tuesday etc etc.
You know what? Marraige has been good to me second time round (remembering the man being of age allready), his son said: great dad but i do not need to know stuff like this, the dad says: i'm having sex almost every night of the week. Almost Monday, almost Tuesday etc etc.
- Dirka
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 212
- Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2015 2:16 pm
- Town: Doornpoort Pretoria
- Vehicle: Hilux 4.0 V6 4X4 Auto DC
- Real Name: Dirk
Re: Joke of the day
..I do however think those legs will look better on a HILUX bonnet!
“I got arrested for driving naked. I guess I shouldn’t have put four wheels, an engine, and a steering wheel on my bathtub.
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Dirka
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 212
- Joined: Tue Jul 07, 2015 2:16 pm
- Town: Doornpoort Pretoria
- Vehicle: Hilux 4.0 V6 4X4 Auto DC
- Real Name: Dirk
Re: Joke of the day
LOL
“I got arrested for driving naked. I guess I shouldn’t have put four wheels, an engine, and a steering wheel on my bathtub.
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
I’m a do-it-yourself kind of lover.” ― J. Kintz
- arnize2
- LR 4WD Full Lockers
- Posts: 743
- Joined: Tue Mar 30, 2010 12:47 pm
- Town: Wellington
- Vehicle: 2008 Toyota Hilux 3.0 D4D D/C 4X4
- Real Name: Arno
- Location: Malmesbury
Re: Joke of the day
Nou lanklaas so lekker gelag.
-
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 189
- Joined: Sat May 14, 2011 12:55 pm
- Town: Brisbane Australia
- Vehicle: 1985 4 runner sr5 3y engine
- Real Name: Russell
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrDYdh7 ... u4IWOmYGFU" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- Obelix and Dogmatix
- LR4WD, Lockers, Crawler Gears
- Posts: 1837
- Joined: Sun Nov 17, 2013 5:27 pm
- Town: ROODEPOORT
- Vehicle: HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix, donated to some clown, HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix II Onca front and rear Amade extreme Suspension and under water breathing apparatus
- Real Name: Quentin
- Location: Allens Nek
Re: Joke of the day
Upon arriving home, a husband was met at the door by his sobbing wife. Tearfully she explained, “It’s the pharmacist. He insulted me terribly this morning on the phone.”
Immediately the husband drove downtown to confront the pharmacist and demand an apology.
Before he could say more than a few words, the druggist told him, “Now, just a minute, please listen to my side of it…
This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I locked the house with both house and car keys inside. I had to break a window to get my keys. Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket.”
He continued, “Later, about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire. When I got to the store there was a bunch of people waiting for me to open up. I opened and started waiting on these people, and all the time the darn phone was ringing off the hook.”
He continued, “Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I got down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels; the phone was still ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with bunch of perfume bottles on it…all of them hit the floor and broke.
Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer…and, honest mister, all I did was tell her!”
Immediately the husband drove downtown to confront the pharmacist and demand an apology.
Before he could say more than a few words, the druggist told him, “Now, just a minute, please listen to my side of it…
This morning the alarm failed to go off, so I was late getting up. I went without breakfast and hurried out to the car, just to realize that I locked the house with both house and car keys inside. I had to break a window to get my keys. Then, driving a little too fast, I got a speeding ticket.”
He continued, “Later, about three blocks from the store, I had a flat tire. When I got to the store there was a bunch of people waiting for me to open up. I opened and started waiting on these people, and all the time the darn phone was ringing off the hook.”
He continued, “Then I had to break a roll of nickels against the cash register drawer to make change, and they spilled all over the floor. I got down on my hands and knees to pick up the nickels; the phone was still ringing. When I came up I cracked my head on the open cash drawer, which made me stagger back against a showcase with bunch of perfume bottles on it…all of them hit the floor and broke.
Meanwhile, the phone is still ringing with no let up, and I finally got to answer it. It was your wife. She wanted to know how to use a rectal thermometer…and, honest mister, all I did was tell her!”
Rules are there to make you think before you break them!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!
-
- Low Range 4WD
- Posts: 160
- Joined: Tue Dec 02, 2014 2:10 pm
- Town: King Williams Town
- Vehicle: Isuzu
- Real Name: Craig
Re: Joke of the day
[FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY][FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY]
Sent from my D2403 using Tapatalk
Sent from my D2403 using Tapatalk
Isuzu 250D 4x2 with diffy lock
1 x Humorous Driver
GPS,Dashcam,tyre levers
I don't live in Africa, Africa lives in me - Kyle my son.
1 x Humorous Driver
GPS,Dashcam,tyre levers
I don't live in Africa, Africa lives in me - Kyle my son.
- Mud Dog
- Moderator
- Posts: 29876
- Joined: Tue Apr 29, 2008 2:18 am
- Town: East London
- Vehicle: '90 SFA Hilux DC 4X4, Full OME, 110mm lift. Brospeed branch, 50mm ss freeflow exhaust. 30 x 9.5 Discoverer S/T's on Viper mags. L/R tank. (AWOL) '98 LTD 2.4 SFA, dual battery system. Dobinson suspension, LR tanks, 31" BF mud's.
- Real Name: Andy
- Club VHF Licence: HC103
Re: Joke of the day
When your road comes to an end ...... you need a HILUX!.
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
Life is like a jar of Jalapeño peppers ... what you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.
Don't take life too seriously ..... no-one gets out alive.
It's not about waiting for storms to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain.
And be yourself ..... everyone else is taken!
- GI Jane
- Monster Truck
- Posts: 4019
- Joined: Mon May 16, 2011 4:07 pm
- Town: Strand WC
- Vehicle: Toyota Hilux 4x4, 2.41t Raider 1998 DC - front & rear difflock, 140lt fuel tank, 31" BFG a/t, snorkel, drawer system, alucab canopy, driver with attitude.
- Real Name: Val
- Club VHF Licence: X112
Re: Joke of the day
that's the type of thing you could do when your retired, and have nothing else to do..
- Obelix and Dogmatix
- LR4WD, Lockers, Crawler Gears
- Posts: 1837
- Joined: Sun Nov 17, 2013 5:27 pm
- Town: ROODEPOORT
- Vehicle: HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix, donated to some clown, HILUX 4.0 V6 4x4 named Obelix II Onca front and rear Amade extreme Suspension and under water breathing apparatus
- Real Name: Quentin
- Location: Allens Nek
Re: Joke of the day
never stuff around with a retiree!!!!
Rules are there to make you think before you break them!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!
God made man before
woman so as to give him time
to think of an answer
for her first question.
COMMON SENCE IS NOT A GIFT, IT IS A PUNISHMENT!! BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERYONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE IT!!!