Die Boer en die prokureur

[CasKru]

'n Boer, Piet, was in ‘n motor ongeluk. In die hof, is die vervoermaatskappy se hot shot prokureur besig om hom te ondervra.

Het jy, op die ongelukstoneel, gesê: “Eks orraait!” vra die prokureur.

Piet: Wel, kom ek vertel jou wat gebeur het. Ek het net my gunsteling koei, Bessie, op die sleepwa gelaai en...

Prokureur val hom in die rede:”Ek vra nie vir detail nie, antwoord net die vraag. Het jy, op die ongelukstoneel gesê: “Eks orraait!” Ja of nee?

Piet: Wel, ek het net vir Bessie op die sleepwa gehad en ek was skaars op die pad...

Prokureur val hom weer in die rede en sê aan die regter: Edelagbare, ek probeer net die feit vasstel, dat hierdie man, by die ongelukstoneel, aan die verkeersman gesê het dat hy oraait is. Nou probeer hy my kliënt dagvaar. Ek glo vas hy is ‘n bedrieër. Sê asb vir hom hy moet net die vraag beantwoord.

Teen hierdie tyd is die regter al redelik geintresseerd in Piet se storie oor Bessie, en sê vir die prokureur: “Ek wil graag sy storie oor die koei hoor”.

Ou Piet bedank die regter en gaan voort met sy storie. “Wel, soos ek gesê het, ek het net vir Bessie op die sleepwa gelaai en was op die pad toe daar skielik ‘n moerse trok van die kant af kom, n stop straat skip en my bakkie en sleepwa in hulle moer in ry. Ek is eenkant toe gegooi in n sloot en Bessie anderkant toe in ‘n ander sloot. Ek was seer, nogals erg seer en wou nie beweeg nie. In elk geval, ek het toe vir Bessie gehoor kerm en ek het geweet sy is in erge pyn, net deur te luister na haar kreune. Nou, net na die ongeluk, kom daar n spietkop op die toneel aan en hy het ook Bessie se gekerm gehoor, so hy het toe nader aan haar gegaan. Nadat hy na haar gekyk het en die toestand gesien het waarin sy was, het hy sy pistool uitgetrek en haar tussen die oë geskiet.”

”Toe kom die spietkop oor die pad na my kant toe, sy pistool nogsteeds in sy hand, en hy vra: Hoe voel jy?”

”Nou vertel vir my, meneer prokureur, wat de F…. sou jy vir hom gesê het?”

[ToyX4]

Grapgat

[CasKru]

Daai is ek ja :)

[Family_Dog]

And at about the same time, this was posted on the AVSA forum:

--

A farmer was in a motor accident. In court, the courier company was represented by their hot-shot lawyer who was busy questioning the farmer on the stand. Did you, asked the lawyer, at the scene of the accident, say “I am alright”?

The farmer answered, “Let me tell you what happened – I had just loaded my favourite cow Daisy onto the trailer and…..”

The lawyer cut him off mid sentence and said “I’m not asking you for details, just answer the question – at the scene of the accident did you say that you were alright – Yes or no?”

“Well” said the farmer, “I had just loaded Daisy onto the trailer and was barely on the road…”

Again the lawyer interrupted him and addressed the judge: “Your honour, I am trying to ascertain the fact that this man, at the scene of the accident, informed the traffic officer that he was alright, and that he is now trying to sue my client on the basis that he was injured. I believe that he is being a hostile witness. Please instruct him to answer the question”

By this time the judge was rather interested in the farmer’s story and said to the lawyer, “I would really like to hear his explanation regarding the cow.”

The farmer thanked the judge and proceeded with his explanation – “Well, as I said, I had just loaded Daisy onto the trailer and was barely on the road when suddenly a huge truck came from one side, skipped a traffic light and smashed into my pickup and the trailer. I was thrown into the ditch on one side of the road and Daisy was thrown into the ditch on the other side of the road. I was sore, VERY sore, and did not want to move. Anyway, while lying there, I heard Daisy crying and I knew that she was in worse pain than I was just by the sound of her cries. Just after the accident a traffic office arrived at the scene and he also heard Daisy’s cries of pain. Once he had seen her condition he drew his firearm and shot Daisy between the eyes. The officer then approached my side of the road with his firearm still in his hand and asked “How do you feel?” -Now tell me judge, what the HELL would you have told him?”


-F_D